Write a story that begins with... "If I only knew then what I know now..."

The story could be about regrets, lost opportunities, or just plain humor. You decide! The only thing is the story must start with... "If I only knew then what I know now..."

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4 comments posted
If Only.......

If only I knew then what I know now. Maybe everything would have been different.
Some people say that when you die all your memories flash by quickly, then it's black, and you're left to drift in an abyss of darkness for the rest of eternity, unconscious to the world around you. Those people have clearly never been dead. I have, and I can tell you being dead is nothing like that. Sure, you drift around in your subconsciousness for a while before finding your feet, but that's only for a while. Being dead is nothing like what they say it is. In fact it's quite fun.

But anyways, back to the main point. When you regain your head after drifting around subconscious for God knows how long, you're given a choice. Either make peace with your past and move on, or stay wandering, a restless spirit. You're probably saying, oh but what are you talking about? There's nothing for me to make peace with. Trust me on this one, but there always is. Everyone has secrets buried deep inside them and in the end, you have to make peace with them.

It's like you're handed a camera with all your best and worst memories in them. All those pictures you thought you deleted shoved in your face. Some people get stuck on certain pictures, certain moments, that they're just not ready to let go of. But in order to move on, they have to go through all the pictures. The good and the bad. There are gaps in between, sometimes years, that make you wonder, what the hell happened here?

Time is running out, and I really need to let go. So I guess we should start at the beginning, with the basics.

My full name is Mila Rosemary Thomason. I was almost eighteen when I died. I'm part of a dysfunctional family that's perfect to the world, always smiling, always laughing, and never emotional. I was named Mila after my mother, and Rosemary after my grandmother, who my father says were shining examples of what a Thomason should be. He failed to point out that neither of them were actually Thomasons by blood. I guess I'm what you would call the black sheep of the family, but that be an incorrect definition. No one in my family is normal. Adults are just empty bodies, filled with things that want to make more and more money. Children are just leverage to gain a steadier footing on the steep mountain we call society. I'm a Thomason by blood, but I'm not one of them.

My parents didn't care about losing me, they just didn't want to lose another daughter. Which is probably a good thing too, because Mila Rosemary Thomason was never born. I'm just the daughter they wanted me to be. And alien inhibiting Mila's body. A clone of Tresa. I hated her, I never understood her. But now? I may finally do. She suffered from the same fate I did, so she decided to end it. She couldn't change her past, and she definitely couldn't change her future, so she decided to stop it, to escape, leaving me to sole heir to the Thomason fortune, as well as the expectations. With no one to help me carry the burden of their expectations, I sank deeper and deeper into the whirlpool of uncertainty and unhappiness, the very same pool Tresa had drowned herself in. But it wasn't going to be easy for my parents to let me out of their sight.

So I planned, I plotted. It took me years, but I finally left. That day I took my foot out of the threshold and never looked back. And that? That's really where my story begins.

- Vivian Q ©

Posted by Anonymous on Sun, 05/03/2015 - 08:05
L.I.U( Life is us)

If only I knew that our lives could be determined by us.
That we get can freely do what ever we wanted.
I know that now. We could go against ideas, laws, criterias.
Though we don't....life seems too precious.
We don't put certain ideas into action because of the fear of judgement, consequence, penalties, its all the same.
Its society that makes us feel this way.
If so, are we really independent? Basing everything on ideas of society isn't at all. Independence is mostly about not caring what people think, yet if we do as we please to a certain limit, it might be punishable.
Yes it is a contradiction, but think about it.
People do as they please all the time,
yet to a certain extent.
Why?

Posted by Anonymous on Wed, 05/07/2014 - 22:48
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Posted by Anonymous on Thu, 11/22/2012 - 21:51
If only i knew then what i

If only i knew then what i know now i would have by now be living a life enviable by all gentlemen. What more can a young man pray for apart from a respectable life, happily married to a wife that can be passed for a princess?
It gives me pain to think about it but i must say it out and hope it gives me some relief. If i had known that she loved me that much, our names would have replaced that of Romeo and Juliet in the book of love. I loved her, God knows i did. I was ready to break boundaries for her and i did.
It started on a fateful day when i was on my way to school. I met Janet and it looked like she had been waiting for me. I greeted her casually and went on my way but she stopped me and volunteered to walk me school, she said she had something important to tell me so i let her.
We talked about several irrelevant things until she said " when did u see Mary last? ".
" we were together last week " ,I told her
"did she tell u she was getting married?"
"yes", i answered "we are getting married after my youth service".
"not to you", she said, " to another person ".
"who is he? ", i asked her wishing she would say it was a joke.
"i dunno him but they say he is a business man from the city". I knew she was serious but i tried to look not disturbed. I thanked her and took off to school.
At school, i couldnt concentrate on anything. I kept asking myself why Mary will choose to betray me after all these years. I was going to see her immediately after school. If i am able to pass my final exams i will be offered a job by an oil company in the city and then we will start talking about marriage with Mary. I walked into their compound confidently like i used to, i saw her mother and greeted her but the manner in which she answered baffled me. She talked to me like i was an intruder and warned me to stay away from her daughter. I told her to atleast tell me where Mary is and she said, "I know not of Mary but if u mean my daughter, she is happily married and now 'Mrs Jacob' ". With these she showed me the gate and advised me to look at the compound very well because it may the last time i am seeing it.
I couldnt understand how the Mary i was happily with just last week could be now married without my knowledge and to worsen the situation, everybody talks as if she was happy to leave me and i felt betrayed. I was made to believe that she never loved me and that she was just using me because she thought i had a bright future, and now that she couldnt wait she found an already made husband and had to abandon me.
I was so depressed for the next few days and eventually flunked my final papers. It didnt pain me as there was no purpose in passing it. I didnt want to talk or hear anything about Mary until one Friday evening while i was walking idly in the village, i saw an ambulance with a corpse in it. I later learnt that it was Mary ; she commited suicide because her parents forced her to get married to a man she does not love and she had vowed that her body belonged only to me.
On hearing this i broke into tears and was later rescued from attempted suicide.
If only i knew what i know now, if i knew that Mary was forced to marry another man against her will, i would have done everything possible to show her how much i care and save our relationship.

Posted by Anonymous on Sat, 05/26/2012 - 01:14

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